As a Child

As a child I wanted to be a doctor
To cure people of disease
As a teen I wanted to be a neurosurgeon
To fix brains with a scalpel

As a young woman
I became a psychotherapist
To fix troubled youth with broken lives
With the exchange of spoken words

I kept falling apart
My brain was broken
My thoughts self-loathing or racing
My emotions unbearably intense

Over and over
I sought and received help
First with psychotherapy
Later with medicine

Today I remain a broken woman
Still healing, still learning
Today I use words, written words, spoken words
To touch, heal, and teach others

Or so I hope

46 thoughts on “As a Child

  1. glenn2point0 August 16, 2014 / 7:53 pm

    Hey Kitt, thanks for not mixing words. We are broken, and this is highlighted and at its most extreme if you take away our medications. And who knows how long the medications will be effective for? And, yes, your words touch others. Thanks!

    Liked by 1 person

    • Kitt O'Malley August 17, 2014 / 12:10 pm

      You are welcome. We mourn the loss of dreams, of expectations, of functionality, when we are saddled with a mental illness. Life, quite simply, is not fair.

      Like

      • glenn2point0 August 17, 2014 / 8:16 pm

        But we do adapt as best we can ☺

        Liked by 1 person

  2. Gunmetal Geisha August 16, 2014 / 6:30 pm

    I wish we could exchange “broken” for “shaken.” “Broken” seems final. “Shaken” could go on for a long time, but it could stop too.

    Like

  3. stockdalewolfe August 16, 2014 / 6:06 pm

    Thank you for educating us all on Bipolar disorder with your intelligent, honest prose and poetry. You are doing Bipolars a tremendous service.

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Just Plain Ol' Vic August 16, 2014 / 5:36 pm

    This is such a beautifully worded post, so honest. Personally I do not like to think of anyone with mental health issues as “broken.” Certainly I do not look at my wife that way.

    Humans are wonderfully complex and flawed creatures. To be flawed, to have challenges in life and to strive to overcome is part of the human experience.

    In the short time I have known you, I am confident that you have the strength to heal!

    Liked by 1 person

  5. erin stokes August 16, 2014 / 3:52 pm

    Dear Kitt,

    After reading the material in your blog, I would like to ammend my comment.

    Thank you for sharing your story. Your courage is inspiring to me on a personal level. The education that you are offering to the public is fantastic. I wish you fulfilling success professionally and personally. I am excited to be able to follow your story in future.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Kitt O'Malley August 16, 2014 / 5:22 pm

      Thank you, Erin. Very thoughtful and generous of you.

      Like

  6. philsblog01 August 16, 2014 / 3:40 pm

    Kitt, you may be wounded by life’s arrows, you are not broken. Your very blog, including your poetry clearly demonstrate that. Phil.

    Like

  7. Indah Susanti August 16, 2014 / 3:18 pm

    So deep and beautiful, sincere and thoughtful. Be strong and I know you are and you will…my best wishes for you..

    Liked by 1 person

  8. mihrank August 16, 2014 / 3:09 pm

    wow – what a strong honest introduction about yourself. I am glad and humbled sharing it. I will always wish you success and good health!!

    Liked by 1 person

  9. erin stokes August 16, 2014 / 3:07 pm

    That was beautiful Kitt. Terribly honest and honestly terrible. I am sorry for your suffering, I know plenty of it myself.

    Liked by 2 people

    • Kitt O'Malley August 16, 2014 / 5:08 pm

      Thank you so much. Sorry to hear that you have known suffering, too.

      Like

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