#BeReal – KITT O’MALLEY

Hastywords invited me to join her #BeReal series. Check out the great writing she features in the #BeReal series.

HASTYWORDS

My #BeReal guest today is Kitt O’Malley.

Kitt is full of surprises and I have had the honor of seeing her lovely face on twitter quite often.  She is a supportive member of the mental health community online and I am super glad she is participating in this series.

Thank you for sharing your real with us Kitt.


Be Real x 2

Q: Who am I really?

A: On my About Me & This Blog page, I describe myself as a minivan-driving wife and mother, who unlike most of my suburban neighbors, lives with bipolar disorder. My struggle with mental illness has given me a sense of purpose. What is that purpose? I find out daily as it unfolds. For now, I blog, keep active on social media, share mental health resources with others, and dip my toe into volunteer work. Honestly, though, I’m a diva who belongs on stage preaching her message.

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Who Am I Really?

Mystic Bipolar Crazy Bitch in permanent marker font on forehead of selfie showing eyes & forehead

Who am I really?
Mystic bipolar
Crazy bitch
Compassionate healer
Mental health advocate
Creative, passionate, intelligent
Wife and mother
Living purposefully
That purpose unfolds daily
As I parent my son
As I write, as I blog
As I connect with others
As I share mental health resources
As I dip my toe into volunteer work
Honestly, though, I’m a diva
Who belongs on stage
Preaching her message
For all to hear

Still Insecure

#BeReal Image of me without make-up on left, wrinkles and turkey neck evident. Image of me with make-up and hair blown dry straight on right, no wrinkles or turkey neck in evidence.

Hastywords asked me to participate in her #BeReal campaign. On my first response to one of her questions, I showed my insecurity rather than my confidence. Both are just as much a part of me. Just as real. I am not without self-doubt or self-loathing. I am both confident and insecure.

Here is her question and my first response. (I rewrote it and sent her a more confident response for publication.)

Q: What do you think most people think about you by just seeing your picture?

A: Left-hand image: middle-aged, fat, plain, sex-less. Right-hand image: white privileged bitch.

Honestly, I have no desire to analyze my response. Only want to put it out there. Sometimes I feel good about myself, other times I do not. I am not as sexy as I once was.

I do not present myself as sexy, for that would be inappropriate. My son would die of embarrassment, and my husband prefers that I present that side of myself in private only to him.

I am aware that I am privileged. I know that. I look like the educated, upper middle class suburban mother that I am. When I speak, I often use big words, which can be offputting. Not everyone likes me. So be it.