As California burns, I pause, having finished copying and pasting my blog posts into Scrivener. Next step is to rewrite multiple overview posts about my mental health journey from age eighteen to now. See book outline as my mental health history, chronological posts worth sharing organized by year and month, with appendix of US mental health resources. Will eventually need to ask permission to publish pieces I originally wrote for other websites or publications. I always gave credit where it was due.
Yesterday got my four year anniversary notification from WordPress.com. Still copying and pasting posts into Scrivener for eventual publication as a book. Not all posts will make the cut. Plan to begin with a narrative of my mental health journey starting at eighteen, then chronologically publish my posts that speak from my heart. That’s how I’m organizing it so far in Scrivener.
Right now I’m writing in WordPress online. I write using whatever is handy — WordPress, Word, Google Docs, Pages on my iPad, emails to myself, even paper and journals (unfortunately, I cannot read my handwriting and I type faster).
When I first purchased Scrivener, I either copied and pasted or imported my blog posts from September 2013 to October 2014. I don’t recall how I got the material into the program. Then I stopped, overwhelmed by the complexity of Scrivener. Now that I did the tutorial, I’m organizing those posts. Feels good. Really good.
Later I will add pieces written since then. I tried to download my blog since October 2014, but the xml document is filled with HTML code which I’d have to scrub. I can use find and replace using a text editor like WordPad, but I don’t want to risk mangling or deleting my text. Probably easier to copy and paste posts into Notepad to remove code. I’m no pro at handling xml files and can find no easy answers online.
October 2015, I last modified the import of my blog into Scrivener thinking I’d massage my writing into a book. The next month, my mother had a stroke. Never got back to the book or to figuring out Scrivener. Just finished the tutorial.
My first Scrivener project contains my outdated blog dump. Sometimes I edit old posts and pages, so I need to figure out how to import my current version of this site. Haven’t had luck so far today. I did create a blank new project into which I plan to organize my writing under four categories:
Kate — fictionalized autobiography, starting at the beginning…
I don’t want to write about suicide
I don’t want the image of her
Clinging onto a chain link fence
Chef’s knife in hand
Chef’s knife inside of her
Looking through the chain link
At kids playing in the park
She mourned the loss of her son
She could not contain her grief
She could not hold on
She had other children
They no longer had a mother
My father no longer had a cousin
I no longer had a cousin once removed
When I was 18
I, too, wanted to kill myself
I thought the world
Better off without me
Better off without me
The emotional pain
A living hell
But I didn’t kill myself
I sought help
I got help
But I was not a mother
Grieving the loss of her son