Category: Acceptance
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Shedding a Few Tears
It’s been a year. It’s been a year since I noticed that my mother hadn’t taken her turn in Words with Friends. It’s been a year since my mother was verbal. It’s been a year since she could use language. Her passion was words. She spent her days playing word games. She was proud that she…
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Where Am I Going Now?
Originally written October 2015, a month before my mother had her stroke, before my life changed. Still settling into my new normal. How do I describe myself? How do I best describe my blog? What has my blog become? What direction do I want to take it? What direction is my life taking? Is my writing…
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Fingers Moving, Fingers Typing
Fingers need to move nervous energy prompts them to keep busy Just as my thoughts my mind will not be silent My fingers will not be still so I play Solitaire or now type I imagine myself crocheting as I did long ago as a young girl Used to crochet needlepoint embroider and sew Used…
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Folie à Deux
I Am My Mother Caveat: Please understand that delusional thought processes are SYMPTOMS of mental illness. I feel compassion, even as I feel pain and anger as someone negatively affected by parental delusional thoughts. I, too, have experienced delusional thoughts and bizarre impulses. I’m heir to familial mental illness. I get it. With great trepidation…
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Siren Song
I have heard the siren song of alcohol and marijuana. Craved the quieting of my thoughts, the slowing down. Prescribed medications do help immensely, but I still understand and am wary of alcohol&#… Source: Siren Song
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Writing on a Plane
Travel Journal from Las Vegas to Portland On my way, our way, to Oregon to visit family. Tonight driving out to the coast to stay at the Adobe. Tomorrow Jennifer is visiting from Australia. BBQ at in-laws to celebrate and to meet her new boyfriend. Will then have to stay in Newport at the Shilo…
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Kitt's Invented Platitudes
Rarasaur’s Platitudes “But then… people learn.” “Everything’s gonna be okay. (Except when it’s not.) ((Except that’s okay, too.))” I think it is human nature to ascribe or find meaning to events in our lives. Sometimes platitudes makes us feel better. Sometimes worse. My Invented Platitude Nothing is always true, except when it is. The Platitudes…
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Heavy Heart
Now that I filed taxes and got my parents settled in to their memory care community, I’m able to take a breathe and feel the weight of caregiving on me, on my now heavy heart. Struggling with the weight of caregiving for parents with dementia and a son with migraines while I live with bipolar…
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Day from Hell
Recently my mother slammed the door on her speech therapist. She refused nursing care for herself and blocked nurses from seeing my father. Her behavior has caused both of them to be discharged as patients from home health services. No more home nursing visits, physical therapy or speech therapy. My parents reside in a board…