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Going to #BlogHer16

Aug 1, 2016

in Anxiety, Mental Health, Mindfulness, Triggers to Mood Cycling, Writing

This week, I’m going to BlogHer16. This will be my first BlogHer conference, my first blogging conference. I’m anxious. Worried about not having the energy to participate. Worried about being overwhelmed. Surprised I’m not worried about triggering mood cycling. Deep breath. Wish me well!

Poetry Reading in Long Beach

Jul 27, 2016

in Anxiety, Human Rights, Poetry, Writing

Sunday I drove up to Long Beach for the On The Edge poetry reading of Ra Avis, Bill Friday & Matthew Blashill. I was nervous about going to a poetry reading, as I haven’t attended artsy hip anything in decades. As I drove through downtown Long Beach, I felt very suburban middle-aged. Once there, though, I was…

I Got Out of the House This Week!

Jun 23, 2016

in Anxiety, Bipolar Disorder, Depression, Medication, Mental Illness, Motherhood, Psychosis, Stroke

My major achievement this week was to get out of the house TWICE for ME – not just driving my son to and from school or caring for my parents. Monday: OC Writers Write-In Monday I attended an OC Writers write-in where I wrote 3282 words freely. The words need editing. They need shape. They possibly need to be…

Catharsis

May 30, 2016

in Anxiety, Bipolar Disorder, Caregiving, Dementia, Family, Migraine, Stroke

Ok, so, um, I’ve always sort of put myself out there. Way before I ever had therapy or was interested in psychology. It just is my temperament. And, not only is it my temperament, but it’s been something of a defense mechanism. If I put myself out there, then people can’t hurt me with any…

May is Mental Health Month

May 3, 2016

in Alcoholism, Anxiety, Bipolar Disorder, Depression, Disability, Discrimination, Mental Health, NAMI, Stigma

Journal Writing

Mar 13, 2016

in Anxiety, Blogging, Mental Health, Stress, Writing

Saturday, March 5, 2016 Here I am at my parents’ house writing. Not necessarily for my blog, though I did save this to my blog writing folder on my hard drive. No, I’m free-writing for myself. Journaling. In the traditional sense. To ease my anxiety. To use some of the energy that my cup of…

I've Been Really Busy

Mar 4, 2016

in Anxiety, Caregiving, Dementia, Family, Stroke

I haven’t been blogging as much recently because I’ve simply been too busy to do so. Moved my parents into Silverado Memory Care Community in San Juan Capistrano Wednesday. My parents are getting excellent care at Silverado. Already they have participated in the social hour and taken a Zumba exercise class. The caregivers are attentive.…

Freaking Out

Jan 17, 2016

in Anxiety, Bipolar Disorder, Caregiving, Dementia, Hypomania, Migraine, Self care, Stroke, Triggers to Mood Cycling

Once again I accidentally skipped a medication dose. Thursday evening I forgot to take my divalproex (used to treat seizures, migraines and bipolar disorder), making me less stable, more irritable, short-tempered with my husband, overwhelmed, emotionally fragile, raw and vulnerable. F*ck. So that’s a bit of background for how I felt Friday and Saturday. Am…

Change is Anxiety Provoking

Jan 9, 2016

in Anxiety, Bipolar Depression, Bipolar Disorder, Caregiving, Dementia, Depression, Family, Stroke

Great news. Monday I am moving my parents into shared rooms – and most importantly, a shared bed – at a board and care close to my home. To that end, I’ve been busy with electronic paperwork and facilitating the transfer of my mother from skilled nursing stroke rehab and my father from assisted living memory…

My Hands are Still Shaking

Nov 7, 2015

in Anxiety, Bipolar Parenting, Mental Illness

Thursday I met with the Campus Director of my son’s new school, Halstrom Academy. My hand shook as I wrote out the check for tuition. Haven’t paid for school since my son was in daycare back when I worked outside the home. Starting Monday, my son will take one class a day, one-on-one with a…

Category: Anxiety