Coping with Illness

Deleting Emails

For the past few weeks (three?), my son and I (and my husband, but he’s taking care of us) have been sick with gastroenteritis. I haven’t been able to keep up with my usual writing, or with sharing mental health resources on social media. To cope with the many emails piling up, I’m deleting most of them. Yes, I could schedule sharing them, but I simply don’t feel up to it.

When I checked my email this morning, I saw that I had incurred a late fee and interest for a missed credit card payment, which I thought I had already paid online. (Called the credit card company and had the charges reversed.) If I can’t pay bills on time, I need to cut back and focus. I pride myself on managing money well (my last paid job was as an investment analyst for an entrepreneur).

Honestly, all I’ve been up to is watching TV and doing jigsaw puzzles on my iPad. Far cry from workaholic investment analyst.

Worn Out

Tired Collage
Photos taken & poem written October 2015. It’s that season again…

Exhausted

Overwhelmed
Not thinking clearly
Not able to complete sentences
Not able to answer direct questions

Fumbling with language
With spoken language
With what I hear
With what I read

So sleepy
Feared falling asleep
Driving to doctor’s office

Door locked
Looked at calendar
Over an hour early

Went back to parked car
Overlooking hill of eucalyptus
Enjoyed view

Tolerated gardeners
Noisy leaf blowers
Those things should be illegal

Wish I had slept
That extra hour
Though not sure
It would have helped

Seems there’s no refilling
This empty tank
No overcoming
This fatigue right now

Seasonal and situational
Wait it out?
Perhaps
Not sure

Blogiversary

Happy Anniversary with WordPress.com! You registered on WordPress.com 4 years ago. Thanks for flying with us. Keep up the good blogging.
Yesterday got my four year anniversary notification from WordPress.com. Still copying and pasting posts into Scrivener for eventual publication as a book. Not all posts will make the cut. Plan to begin with a narrative of my mental health journey starting at eighteen, then chronologically publish my posts that speak from my heart. That’s how I’m organizing it so far in Scrivener. 

Organizing in Scrivener #amwriting

When I first purchase Scrivener, I either copied and pasted or imported my blog posts from September 2013 to October 2014. I don't recall how I got the material into the program. Then I stopped, overwhelmed by the complexity of Scrivener. Now that I did the tutorial, I'm organizing those posts. Feels good. Really good.
Organizing old posts by month written. Painstakingly slow, but have to start somewhere.

Right now I’m writing in WordPress online. I write using whatever is handy — WordPress, Word, Google Docs, Pages on my iPad, emails to myself, even paper and journals (unfortunately, I cannot read my handwriting and I type faster).

When I first purchased Scrivener, I either copied and pasted or imported my blog posts from September 2013 to October 2014. I don’t recall how I got the material into the program. Then I stopped, overwhelmed by the complexity of Scrivener. Now that I did the tutorial, I’m organizing those posts. Feels good. Really good.

Later I will add pieces written since then. I tried to download my blog since October 2014, but the xml document is filled with HTML code which I’d have to scrub. I can use find and replace using a text editor like WordPad, but I don’t want to risk mangling or deleting my text. Probably easier to copy and paste posts into Notepad to remove code. I’m no pro at handling xml files and can find no easy answers online.

Finished Scrivener Tutorial!

Just finished Scrivener tutorial. Considering massaging blog posts into book(s).

October 2015, I last modified the import of my blog into Scrivener thinking I’d massage my writing into a book. The next month, my mother had a stroke. Never got back to the book or to figuring out Scrivener. Just finished the tutorial.

Enrolled in National Association of Memoir Writers‘ online memoir writing course and will be attending the Southern California Writers’ Conference later this month. The conference features memoir writing this year!

My first Scrivener project contains my outdated blog dump. Sometimes I edit old posts and pages, so I need to figure out how to import my current version of this site. Haven’t had luck so far today. I did create a blank new project into which I plan to organize my writing under four categories:

  • Kate — fictionalized autobiography, starting at the beginning…
  • Bipolar — mental health focus
  • Parenting My Son — my son has struggled with migraines since he was two
  • Parents with Dementia — both my parents have dementia and live in memory care

Wish me luck. I may go nowhere with putting together and publishing my writing. I may not. At least I’m writing here. Actually, I’m pretty happy with blog writing.